Chp 96. "AGAPE" Gospel Rehab Camp

“Hnehna chu Lalpa ta a ni.”

Translation: Through God, anything can be conquered.

When I landed back here in Mizoram two weeks ago, my parents wanted me to go to a Camp (spiritual rehab). I always used to consider myself to be a “good enough” Christian: someone who goes to Church on Sundays, sleeps during the Sermon most of the time but concentrates seriously during prayers, breaking many of the laws inscribed in the Holy Bible but at the same time never blaspheming the Word of God, proud to tell my other non-Christian friends about my faith but at the end of the day getting totally wasted together over a bottle of rum or a joint of cigga-wee and trying to convince myself that God understands what my flesh wants so He won’t note this down on His Book.

Just going through some of my past few posts on my blog will echo what I have stated above. Ah the folly of ignorance! How can anyone call themselves a Christian when they choose to follow/practice only what they desire and knowingly ignore the rest?

1 Samuel 15
¹Samuel said to Saul, “I am the one the Lord sent to anoint you king over his people Israel; so listen now to the message from the Lord”.
³ “Now go attack the Amalekites and totally destroy everything that belongs to them. Do not spare anyone”.
⁷Then Saul attacked the Amalekites all the way from Havilah to Shur, to the east of Eygpt.
⁹But Saul and the army spared king Agag and the best of the sheep and cattle, the fat calves and the lambs – everything that was good. These they were unwilling to destroy completely, but everything that was despised and weak they totally destroyed.
¹⁰Then the word of the Lord came to Samuel: ¹¹ “I am grieved that I have made Saul king because he has turned away from me and has not carried out my instructions.”
¹³When Samuel reached him, Saul said, “The Lord bless you! I have carried out the Lord’s instructions.”
¹⁴But Samuel said, “What then is this bleating of sheep in my ears? What is this lowing of cattle that I hear?”

Saul thought he obeyed the Lord’s command when infact all he did was obey a part of it. That would be the same as disobeying His command. Suppose you were told to peel four baskets of potatoes, and you end up peeling only two; Eventually it means you did not peel four baskets of potatoes, regardless of whether you peeled two or three baskets. Many of us are like that: We think we are all leading the life of a good Christian when we do only a part of what we’re actually supposed to do.

Eventually in the end, David took over the throne of Israel from Saul.

1 Chronicles 10 ¹³Saul died because he was unfaithful to the Lord; he did not keep the word of the Lord and even consulted a medium for guidance, ¹⁴and did not inquire of the Lord. So the Lord put him to death and turned the kingdom over to David son of Jesse.

I underwent 5 days of camping at “AGAPE”, Durtlang, under Evangelist Zairemmawia and his group of amazing counselors last week. At first I was a bit hesitant to go to the Camp, because a part of me didn’t want to change. Ofcourse rehab does not necessarily mean you have to change if you don’t want to, but I was thinking more in the lines of “what if I change?” I was afraid to let go of my current lifestyle. I prefer materialism to spiritualism. I like reading and taking part in various discussions because of a strange thirst for knowledge and have an open view/opinion on almost anything from Islam to creationism to racial issues to relationships. I was wondering how some of my so-claimed “unbiased opinions” and “rational thinking” would be affected if I suddenly change. I was also afraid I might turn into a zealot, or worse: one of those people who are more devoted than you are and hence throw around their “Holier than thou” attitude around you. I really hated those people.

How am I feeling right now? Honestly speaking, I’ve never felt this relieved in my entire life. Now I know why so many of my friends who’ve been to camp and who know me well pester me incessantly to go to the camp. When we experience something so great, we like to share it with our loved and dear ones. During my party days, whenever I check out a new discotheque and it turned out to be amazing, I always text message all my closest friends to make sure they go to that place too. In a way, that feeling is similar to this, except that the former comes genuinely from inside while the latter lasts only till the next morning, unless it is accompanied by a head throbbing hangover.

Well so am I a "born-again"? No, but my idea of what a “born again” feels like was completely misguided. Born again does not mean all immoral desires and temptations from Satan will suddenly disappear just like that. All those temptations will ofcourse still be there; but you’ll now have more Power to resist it. Having the desire to revert to your old self is only a way of reminding you that you are only human, just like the rest of us. Born again does not necessarily mean you’ll suddenly start dancing wildly in Churches consumed by the Holy Spirit and start talking in languages nobody on Earth understands. It also does not mean you can suddenly start healing the sick with your hand and prayers, or quit your studies or job to become a missionary in a Country where Christians are persecuted.

Born again is about seeing the light that you’ve been seeing all your life, but this time without using any filters or lenses. Born again is about being face to face with God without the surrounding environment bothering you, and not about wondering what clothes to wear to Church or whether your friends will ridicule you for standing up and clapping your hands when people are singing the hymns. Born again is about realizing how short the Church sermon suddenly seemed and wishing it could go on for atleast another extra hour or two.

Born again is about expressing your true passion during prayers by standing up, raising your hand and shouting out praises to Him rather than asking stupid questions like “whether we can lie down and pray before we go to sleep as long as the urges came from within”. If such urges genuinely came from within, you will definitely not be lying down and praying. Imagine you just won the lottery or India beat Brazil in the Football World Cup Finals: would you casually lie down and nonchalantly remark “yay”?

There are so many other things I want to say but will astutely refrain from talking about it now due to space constraint. Right now, I’ve never felt this much joy and completeness within me in my entire life. During my peniel, I asked the good Lord to give me the wisdom and sapience to write about Him and make me His instrument. Sure this means I will be losing a lot of my regular visitors to my blog, but if my writings can bring Home even one lost sheep, that is far more worthy than leading a thousand sheep away from Home.

This new era will also mean a lot of people will be challenging what I’m saying by quoting different verses from the Bible / scientific propositions and postulates / our Mizo culture and tradition / rationality / different Christian beliefs etc. Let me put it down straight: I may not have the answer you require; you’ll just have to experience what I’m experiencing in order to find all your answers.

Halleluiah. Hnehna chu Lalpa ta a ni.