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Tuesday, January 16, 2018

Chp 696. Mizo Community feast 2017-18


Every year, for Christmas and New Year, we have a community feast, known as "ruaiṭheh" in Mizo. Unlike funerals and other community activities which are organized by our local YMA (Young Mizo Association), the Christmas and New Year ruaiṭheh are organized by people within the same Church denomination (known as "Kohhran") of each locality.

I belong to Chaltlang South Presbyterian Kohhran, and our two ruaiṭheh this time were absolutely rocking, just like other years.

But unlike other years, this time, the shameless me didn't turn up for any "fatu" service. Fatu (which can be both a noun and a verb) is the work we do as a community prior to the feast, where various tasks are divided among the community members - some people have to cut the veggies, others cook the meat, and so on.

I didn't go for the "fatu" because, first of all, it was too damn early to suddenly wake up at 4 in the morning when your biological clock is so used to getting up at 8 every morning the entire year. Secondly, it was too freaking cold. Mizoram hit temperatures as low as 5°C just before I came back to Pune, so you can imagine how warm and comfortable snuggling under one's blanket must be. :)

All my friends took part in the "fatu" though, including my dearly departed friend Matea. Here he is with Sanga at the meat chopping section.


Watching these recent photos makes me so sad… I remember him scolding me on WhatsApp for not turning up at the "fatu". If only I knew he and I would never get to "fatu" together again, I would have sooo turned up!!! :(


At our Kohhran, our Christmas ruaiṭheh takes place every year on the 26th as there's usually three Church services on the 25th - morning, noon and night services. Many other denominations follow this rule too, though not necessarily. For example, outside Mizoram, most Mizo Christian Fellowships across India have their ruaiṭheh on the 25th itself, right after the Christmas service, because of the obvious reason that 26th is not a holiday outside Mizoram.

This was us before heading out to our Church service on Christmas day.


And this was after the Church service, as we lined up to get the refreshment snacks and traditional tea.


The next day, like I already mentioned earlier, I bunked the "fatu" and then shamelessly headed out to the community feast with my niece Nancy and her husband Utsav. You may have seen their wedding photos recently on my blog [Wedding in Goa - part 1 | Wedding in Goa - part 2 | Mysore Adventures - part 1 + 2]. This is with Utsav, Nancy and Nancy's mom.



We lined up together to take our food, buffet style. Most of the food counters were similar, they were just there to distribute the number of people lining up, but there were also special counters for senior citizens and those who "cannot eat animals with four legs", meaning those who eat just chicken and egg, and not beef and pork (hehe, there is no separate counter for vegetarians because a vegetarian Mizo does not exist :P )


Took this photo while we were standing in queue. Lovely scenery indeed.


Our turn to get our food. Young members from our community were designated this task of serving to the masses. We had all been through this as we were brought up.



My plate! Sorry it doesn't look very enticing, but trust me, it was dillu! Ohhh the fatty pork pieces, yummmmm!


Once we had our fill, we kept our plates downstairs where another batch of young volunteers were cleaning the leftovers and washing the plates.

We walked around the place taking a few pics…




For me, the best part about going to our ruaiṭheh is that I get to meet almost everybody in my locality. Neighbors, Church leaders, Schoolmates, friends' parents, and maybe even a potential future wife as well :P We shake hands, exchange pleasantries and quickly update each other on what we've been up to. And of course all my friends' mothers were like, "When the hell are you planning to get married???" :P

Since I don't live in Mizoram, catching up with people from my locality is a very important event for me, whereas somebody who stays there might take such gatherings for granted, after all, they see each other almost every day.

Thus ended our awesome Christmas ruaiṭheh. Back when we were rebellious teenagers, our locality circle of friends (Ryders gang) would always hang out together after the feast. We would make a bonfire, and some of us would slyly sip alcohol while others crack jokes and we used to have so much fun together. Sadly now, things have changed. While some members are no longer with us, most of us are now married and with kids. Their priorities have changed, and I don't blame them for that. Only a handful of us are now single and we reminisced on how awesome it used to be back then :'(

Fast forward one week later, and it's the New Year.

I went to Church on the 1st for the New Year service with my family again…


Selfie from inside the Church, once the service was over. We were just sitting and waiting for the ushers to allow us to go out…


I call this, "When you wanna take a Pray-fie with your sisters but one hand is already holding the phone" :P :D


Finally, the ushers came and allowed us to leave the Church. We all laughed because, just like the earlier Christmas service, we were again one of the lasts to be ushered out of the Church! We joked that cousin BTi probably rejected the advances of one of the ushers, so as revenge they made sure our two bench rows were always the last to leave the Church.


With cousin BTi, the reason why we were always ushered out last :D


Matea relaxing after the Church service :(


Matea with his wife Parteii and daughter Amanda :'(


Once all of us were done with the refreshments and tea, my family went home while I headed over to my second family - our Ryders group of friends. We took a few photos together, just like every other year. Our women were busy with some work so it was just us guys this time.




That night, we were invited to dinner at u-Baby's house and I met a lot of wonderful peeps (will blog about it another day). Since the dinner and socializing went on well past midnight, I once again didn't turn up for the "fatu" the next morning :D

But of course, I attended the New Year ruaiṭheh, the shameless me :D

At first I was reluctant, or as we say it in Mizo "inthlahrung" to attend the feast since I did not help out with the preparation, but then when I heard that my friend Moiteii, aka Lianmawii Hauhnar on Facebook, had never attended a single "fatu" for the past 30+ years but always turned up for the ruaiṭheh, suddenly, I no longer felt reluctant. :D

I went to Matea's place which is our usual rendezvous point before heading out together to the feast. Earlier, we used to go together in a large group, but most of us are now married, so the married ones go with their spouses and kids :(

Long line in front of the food counters…



Selfie with Matea, Muansanga, Hriatpuia and Mamawii as we stood in queue. I'm still heartbroken to know this was the last picture I took with Matea :'(


Lines, lines and more lines. The best part about standing in line with friends is we get to joke and laugh so much about friends and anything in particular.




My New Year ruaiṭheh plate. Yummmmmm. So much pork, fatty juicy pork! :D


And thus ended two awesomely prepared ruaiṭheh. This is why I miss Mizoram so much. Eating together with friends over here in Pune is great too, but nothing can really beat that ambience and sentiment of feasting together with your entire locality back home.

The uniqueness of one's hometown.

Bonus after-ruaiṭheh photo: Below on the right is my dear friend Moiteii, aka Lianmawii Hauhnar on Facebook, the one who hasn't been to a single "fatu" in 30+ years but never fails to attend our ruaiṭheh. This is what you call self-confidence; The perfect making of a Manager in a Corporate office :D Be like Moiteii. :P


Hoping to attend this year's Christmas ruaiṭheh again, if everything goes well.

Until my next post then, cheers everyone.



Wednesday, January 10, 2018

Chp 695. RIP Matea


(I wrote this blog post 2 days ago, but I just couldn't find myself to complete it, I cried every time I tried writing, especially while looking for photos to put on this post, so please understand)



The worst part about staying away from home is when your loved ones pass away in Mizoram. Today I lost my childhood friend and loving brother Matea.


And what makes my grief even more agonizing this time is the fact that I had just left Mizoram and came back to Pune this morning. I spent so many moments with Matea just a few days ago, and he was totally fine. There were no hints of suspicion that something very bad was going to happen. On the night of my departure, Matea was even cracking jokes at our WhatsApp group, asking for a group picnic since I was leaving.


Yesterday, on my way to the airport, I received the sad news that Matea's father-in-law had passed away. He had been battling cancer for a long time, and if I wasn't already halfway to the airport, I would have paid my respect to Parteii before leaving.

I reached Pune at 1 AM this morning and went straight home. I didn't even unpack, I hit snoozeville right away. Woke up at 8 AM and rejoined work grudgingly. At around 12 noon, just as I was about to order lunch, I received the shocking news in our WhatsApp group that Matea who was admitted to Durtlang Synod hospital earlier, had become worse! And then just an hour later, around 1 PM, H announced in our group that he was no more! Just like that. I couldn't breathe, everything happened so fast.

And then other members of our group said that the doctors were able to find a pulse, that he wasn't gone yet. I kept hanging on to the last thread of hope, staring at our WhatsApp group the entire day. Everything else around me was spinning and hazy. My colleagues in office understood and nobody disturbed me.

After much tension and many prayers, my friends finally reported in our group at 4:20 PM that Matea was no longer with us, cause of death: Internal Bleeding.

Time just stood still for me. I was overwhelmed with mixed emotions. A part of me was cursing Matea, why the f**k did you leave us! Another selfish part of me was bemoaning, why did you have to go just when I left Mizoram? Not that I wished it happened while I was there, but I wanted so badly to be there with him and my friends right then.

Just a few days ago, we were hanging out and having so much fun. Our group of friends would always hangout at his house after Church or waited for each other there before going together to our "ruaitheh", our big locality feast. This time was no different either. It felt just like yesterday when he pointed at all the thin white cigarette buds in front of his house and accused me of dirtying his compound and I would protest saying they were mine but I wasn't the one who threw them there as many of our friends tried out my new Esse cigarettes. :)

During this year's "Kumthar ruaitheh" we stood in line together, waiting for our turn to eat…



Muansanga, Hriatpuia and I made fun of his shirt which was hanging out below his jacket from behind…


That day, Matea and I sat together in our community hall and we had a hearty meal. We "gossiped" about the old lady next to us who had impolitely kept her "sachek and antam tui" cups on the bench meant for people to sit, hence making us squeeze together tightly. Neither of us were brazen enough to ask her to kindly place them on the floor, and so we just laughed silently as we sat down uncomfortably, lolz.

Little did I know that that was going to be the last time Matea and I would ever sit together for a meal again :(

Looking at some of the photos we took together this vacation filled my eyes with tears.



Some of you may have seen the Facebook group photo I uploaded, where I mentioned that I asked my friends to send me our group pic and they sent me the one where I looked the worst, lolz. Yeah, it was Matea who sent me that image.


Lazy ass didn't even bother putting in a proper subject line :) His younger cousins and their friends were playing FIFA on the PC that day, and they had to pause their game so he could send me this image. And they were taking his trip the whole time as he kinda forgot how to login to his gmail. Oh such joyful memories, we laughed so much.


Happier times indeed, still can't believe all these pics were just a few days ago.


It's devastating to see how the arms of fortune can turn so suddenly, that too within such a short gap.

I feel extremely sorry for Nu Rozami who has now lost all her sons. Maremtea, Mapuia, and now Matea. I even wrote a tribute to Mapuia when he passed away three years ago. To bring up three boys on your own as a widow and now having to burying all three must be extremely excruciating! :( I promise to keep visiting their house whenever I go home even with my three brothers now gone, just like old times. Nu Rozami is one of the strongest women I've known and I pray that she can pull through this.

My utmost condolences to Parteii as well, who lost both her father and husband in two successive days. This must be the highest degree of pain and torture one can experience. Little Amanda will now grow up without a father, but I promise she will not grow up not knowing him. We will fill her with all the wonderful tales and stories of her father and the crazy things we all used to do together as she grows up.

There's so much to write about Matea, but the more I think about it, the more it hurts. He's not just my childhood friend and neighbor, ever since the start of my education at Neuhof school, he, me and another guy called Rosang something, I don't remember his name now, the three of us would always compete to get the first rank in class, and it would always be one of us bagging that coveted title every term. Even though I moved out of Mizoram from class 4 onward, we continued to keep in touch, and played basketball together whenever I went home for my vacations.



I was a part of the Vikings basketball team and even though we never won any tournaments together, playing with my friends was definitely worth it.

Likewise, we crossed paths so many times outside Mizoram in the coming years, like the times I stayed at his house in Cal during my IIM summer internship at British Petroleum (and ended up missing my flight to Mumbai where I was supposed to present my 2 months research report to the bigwigs of BP. Matea who was working at Hyatt back then, was supposed to wake me up as he came back from his night shift, but he forgot, lolz). Or those memorable 2 years in Delhi we spent together, back when Maremtea was still alive. I have so many photos of those days, but for now, I don't think I have any strength left to put up any more pictures of him. Maybe I'll save that post for another day.

For now, I'll end this post with some of the funeral images my friends shared at our group. It pains me so much that I am unable to be there with the rest of my friends. Since I've been writing this blog post for 2 days now, the images below were taken on 8th and 9th.




Our RYDERS group of friends. Apart from his family, Matea's demise affected us the most :'( Every year, our number grows lesser and lesser...







My blog friend Muantea messaged me last night to tell me the attendance of people from our locality (YMA) who turned up at Matea's house…

Zanin Ni 9 January 2018 Khawhar In kal dan (Malsawmtluanga) Y-I Section Zan khatna:

Y-I: OB - 4, Member - 86, Total - 90
Y-II: OB -  4, Member - 54, Total - 58
M-I: OB - 5, Member - 61, Total - 66
M-II: OB -  4, Member - 33, Total - 37
A-I: OB - 5, Member -  52, Total - 57
A-II: OB - 5, Member - 19, Total - 24
Br.OB - 5

TOTAL - 337

Very impressive numbers indeed. Matea was loved by all within our locality. Such a huge tragedy and loss for those of us who knew him well.

Rest in peace, my brother. You will never be forgotten. We'll ryde again soon on the Otherside.