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Wednesday, June 28, 2023

Chp 884. Paying My Respects

Last month, I finally came down from my secluded farmhouse on the hilltop of Neihbawih to the hustle and bustle of Aizawl City, because I had to take a flight to Mumbai to attend the memorial service of Sidharth Rao held at his farmhouse.

From my farmhouse to his farmhouse, a melancholic melody played across the moonlit skies, weaving a tapestry of unforgettable memories, hidden beneath a façade of smiles.

As I mentioned in my tribute to Sid, I owe him my entire career. He was not just my mentor or boss, he was my friend and flatmate. The least I could do was travel thousands of miles to pay him my last respects.


[Happier days at our Mumbai apartment with the occasional celebrity guest]

My mom and maid came to the farm to stay in my absence, and I bid a short goodbye to my dogs and left for the city. 

I wanted to give Shweta our mitthi puan. A mitthi puan is our Mizo traditional cloth that is given to the family of a deceased, and back in the day, it was considered honourable as the puan was used to drape the body of the deceased.

Semantically speaking, it is actually a gift for the deceased. Like when my dad passed away and we received a mitthi puan, we didn't say, "We received a mitthi puan", the correct way of saying it was, "My dad received a mitthi puan". Hence, this way, Sid could have a part of my culture with him one last time.

Unfortunately, by the time I reached Aizawl late in the night, every shop was already closed, and my mom who would have new puan with her, was at the farmhouse. Luckily for me, my eldest sister U Lapuii had new puan and she gave it to me, rolled in a newspaper just like how we do it here in Mizoram.

The next morning, I left for the airport.

My flight plan was crazy!

Shweta had already booked a bed for me at their farmhouse where only 20 people could stay. And we're talking about Sidharth Rao, the Godfather and Original Gangsta of Indian digital advertising - there were hundreds of people planning to come for the memorial service and I was indeed fortunate to be one of the 20 people to get a place to stay at their farmhouse.

I definitely didn't want to reach late!

Their farmhouse was 3 hours away from Mumbai, and so calculating backwards, I had to land in Mumbai by at least 6 or 7 PM.

Now that was a problem. If I took the 2 PM Aizawl - Kolkata flight, and then took the next 6 PM Kolkata - Mumbai flight, I would land in Mumbai around 10 PM and would only reach the farmhouse by around 2 AM, when everybody would already be asleep!

That was a definite no.

There was an earlier Kolkata - Mumbai flight, but I wouldn't be able to catch that if I took the 2 PM Aizawl - Kolkata flight. However, if I took the 10 AM Aizawl - Guwahati flight instead and then took the connecting Guwahati - Kolkata flight, I could make it for that flight!

And so, that's what I did.

Yeah, I went all the way up to Guwahati first and then took a connecting flight from there to Kolkata, and then took another flight to Mumbai. :D

Oh by the way, on that Guwahati flight, we nearly died! lolz. My friends LS Zadeng and John Opa JohnOp were also on that same flight so you know I ain't lying, they can vouch for it. We hit the motherload of all air pockets, we went freefalling for 5 seconds and everybody screamed for their lives. 5 seconds may not seem like much to you, but it freaking is when you're 10,000 feet above sea level!

Once we landed at Guwahati, everybody disembarked (and congratulated each other that they were still alive) except for 6 of us who were on the connecting flight to Kolkata. Here is a video I took while we waited inside the plane :D

That was the first time I personally saw the amount of quick "repair" the ground staff had to do in case of a severe air pocket incident. I saw them change at least 5 seats that were soiled with piss or shit or vomit. One of the flight attendants was also injured quite badly and had to be carried outside as she wasn't buckled up when that sudden dive happened, and a replacement attendant quickly arrived. The entire plane was cleansed and purified and then it was back to the usual.

The other passengers came in and my long flight continued. Changed planes at Kolkata and by nightfall, we were approaching Mumbai.

I truly miss this view below. Mumbai, the city of lights, the city that never sleeps.

It's been almost 10 years since I last landed in Mumbai because I never went back to Mumbai again after moving to Pune in 2015.

I landed at 7:30 PM and by the time I got my luggage, ate a quick dinner, took a short dump, and walked out of the terminal, it was almost 8:30 PM.

Shweta told me not to book a pre-paid cab from the airport to their farm as that would cost around 3K. Instead, she told me to book an Ola or Uber outstation cab as it was cheaper. I did just that. And turned out, it was indeed cheaper by almost 50%.

Oh Mumbai. So many memories! It was the place where Sidharth had made me become who I am today from literally a nobody. There are so many things I want to write about, but I'll refrain from that or else this post will be too long.

It was a long 3 hours ride to Kharjat from the airport.

I finally reached Sidharth and Shweta's farm - The Rising Sun Farm by 11:30 PM. 

It was sooooo good to see Shweta again and I gave her a long, big hug. Sid's parents had already gone to sleep by then, but Shweta's mom was still staying up, waiting for me to arrive. So sweet of her.

Our dear friend Karan Bareja was there too, making me take a rum shot before I even paid my cab driver, lolz. I was ushered into the cafeteria, which was apparently the first (and only) building on the farm when Sid had initially bought it. Slowly, he and Shweta took it as a side hobby while running multiple corporations and start-ups, and transformed the entire barren farm into this premium yet rustic weekend getaway for the rich and powerful.

Yup, their farm was NOTHING like my farm, lolz. Very secludedly located away from the maddening noise with so many antique furniture and amenities, it was the perfect place for venture capitalists to finalise their next big investment, or company heads and board members to discuss mergers and acquisitions. 

There were three different cooks running the cafeteria, with all sorts of delicacies served, after all, the culinary desire of their exclusive clientele must always be met. Here are a few photos of the farm cafeteria.



We had such a great time catching up on all our crazy old days and talking about Sidharth. Aunty (Shweta's mom) asked me about all the juicy secrets on how Sid and Shweta started dating, as I was the only one who knew about their initial romancing days, and so I spilled it all out that night. :D

Shweta laughed and cried so much. Tanya, Shweta's best friend, told me that that was the first time she was pouring out her feelings and emotions since Sid passed away, as she was just keeping everything bottled up till then. We were really happy to see her letting it all out. It's better to be a rollercoaster of emotions than an emotional train wreck.

As we continued talking about Sid, we also played only his favourite songs from the music system, and each song had a background story worth sharing.

By around 3 AM, I ate their delicious dinner which was mutton and chicken something.

After that, Karan took me to the cottage we were sharing, and everybody else too went to their respective cottages. Had a great sleep.

The next morning, I got to see more clearly how amazing our cottage was! Just check it out.

Their rain shower in each cottage was Heavenly too. I made two short 30-second videos that I quickly edited on Inshot. :D Looks so nice naw?


And the above videos were from just our one cottage, there's a similar setup on all the other cottages as well!

I went to the cafeteria for breakfast and Sid's sister Natasha and her family were already there and we gave each other a long hug. We continued talking about all the wild Mumbai days while eating delicious misal pav.

Natasha too lived in Bandra and she used to come over to our apartment regularly when she wasn't flying (she's a badass commercial pilot). Sometimes we would have dinner at her apartment too, and other times we would all go on a weekend getaway together, like that time we all went to Almitra Villa, where Sid first fell in love with the idea of having his own farm.

After breakfast, Natasha took me to the memorial garden where Sid's ashes were kept. I didn't take any photos as I felt it was inappropriate. 

It was located at the border of the farm, sealed in a concrete box, and a majestic tree cast its protective shadow over it. Natasha told me that the tree was auspicious. Rays of sunlight filtered through the leafy canopy and a small brook gently flowed right next to it, emitting an aura of serenity like a delicate lullaby, perhaps to signify that this was where Sid's weary soul had finally found eternal solace. 

We spent some more time next to Sid's ashes, sometimes in silence and other times laughing at all the crazy things we did together.

But soon, it was time to get ready for the memorial service. The event management company had arrived and was already starting to set up.



Those of us who stayed the previous night all helped Shweta in managing the upcoming event. Karan, Tanya and I along with the others welcomed all the guests who were starting to arrive one by one.

Most of them were giants of our industry (Indian digital space) and we showed them where to park their cars, where to have lunch, where the toilet is, which cottage to temporarily keep their luggage, where to change if they want to take a quick dip in the swimming pool, etc etc.

I met a lot of my former bosses and colleagues too. It was indeed nostalgic. Most of them had grown fatter, but then again, so did I, lolz. There were at least 10 to 20 co-founders or heads of successful startups and businesses, and all of them testified that Sid had played a crucial role in their endeavours.

I sneaked in for a quick lunch when the cafeteria was least crowded and quickly ate lunch.



After lunch, I had a bit of free time and so I went to look for my precious Saddam. The farmhands were taking him and the other dogs for a walk at the other end of the farm. When I saw Saddam, my heart just broke. He was so old now!

This was him in 2012 when Sid and I first got him, and the other photo below was taken in 2013 when he would just sleep peacefully in my arms, snoring softly like a mini thunderstorm. :D

Though Saddam slept in Sid's room, he slept with me whenever Sid was away on a business trip. I felt a bit sad that he no longer recognised me or my smell, but then again, 10 years is a pretty long time too.

Soon, it was 3 PM. We wanted to wait a bit as many guests were still yet to arrive, but many of those who were already there had a night flight to catch. After all, it was a congregation of some of the busiest people in this cutthroat industry.

And so, the memorial service started.

The particular photo above was taken at the very beginning of the service. It might look like only a few people were there, but like I said, most of the invitees arrived a bit later, and there was also a large number of people standing a bit further away under the tree shades because the seating area was directly under the sun, lolz.

It was already so humid, and on top of that, a direct sunbath meant it was scorching hell. You can see my face completely flustered below. I too joined the people standing under the shade after this photo was taken and never sat down again.

So while some of us were helping Shweta manage the event, the credit for this memorial service should go to Meghna, Tanvi and others who organised the entire thing. They were the ones who coordinated everything from inviting people, setting up the right date and venue, etc.

Meghna, or Meg as I fondly call her, was my copy boss at Webchutney. I learnt everything about copywriting from her. She was the one who saw my raw, unfettered creativity and moulded that into a powerful weapon of words. She not only taught me about copywriting but also guided me on how to understand different brand languages, how to conceptualise ideas properly, how to speak to a target audience more efficiently, and so on. That day, Meg was the MC.

After a very moving eulogy, Meg opened the floor to anybody who would like to share their story or testimonials.

One by one, people stood up and shared their experiences. They were all so interesting and moving, with stories ranging from what Sid was going through when he first started Webchutney in 1999, the conversations he had with others when starting a new division, or how this or that got funded, and so on. So many great stories, all narrated by very well-articulated leaders. And most of the speech ended with how Sid had played a vital role in their careers, just like me!

Meg came to me and asked if I too would like to share my testimonial with everybody. I mean I would, but most of the stuff I would want to share was all very personal, and I was happy to have done that with our close circle the previous night.

We took a short snack break.

By then, there was a very large crowd. I met a lot of people I had met back when I was living with Sid, and it was so nice to say hi to them again. And then suddenly I met Mandeep Singh, our landlord! He apparently flew in all the way from Kuwait just to make it for the memorial service.

He brought his daughter along, and he told me she got a very good internship all because of Sid's recommendation. Man, it wasn't just us digital marketing people, Sid's benevolence was affecting everybody.

I also met our two former office-boys Ram Singh and Vijay, who took the effort to come by train till Kharjat railway station and took a bus from there. Everywhere I looked, there were people who had nothing but appreciation for what Sid had done for them.

Around 7 PM, the on-ground open-mic session ended and the online session started. This was for those who couldn't make it to the venue. Meg and the other organisers had already created a Zoom link and hundreds of people were online. They too shared their tearful testimonials one by one in front of everybody.

The event was finally over by 9 PM. A couple of people who had to go to the airport directly took a shower in our cottage, while others who had an early morning flight could stay over for the night. As for me, I packed my bags as I was leaving with Amit and Sonal.

I found Shweta at the cafeteria and I could make out she was extremely exhausted and emotionally drained, but being her, she was still putting up a strong and brave face. I gave her a long hug goodbye and then presented her our mitthi puan, while explaining its significance in our Mizo culture.

I promised her that I would come back to visit again.

By the way, Shweta was personally gifting 2-3 boxes of mangoes to every person! She insisted that it was what Sidharth would have wanted, as the mangoes were all from their farm. All those trees you saw in the photos above were all mango trees, and with the region extremely humid, it had the perfect growing condition.

As I headed to Amit's car, I saw Saddam slowly stumbling and sniffing on plants, and so I spent a few more minutes with him. I tried my best not to cry, but to no avail. 

Considering his current physical condition (old age, blind in one eye, bone issues) and emotional condition (Sid had looked after him since he was a puppy), there's a chance that I might not see him again when I visit next. Reading my old blog updates now like Hello Saddam about when he first came into our lives makes me even sadder.

A big thanks once again to Meg, Tanvi and others for organising this heartrending memorial service. Tanvi reached out to everybody asking for photos of Sid, and those photos were played on a loop in the background during the open-mic session.

When I was looking for photos of Sid to send to Tanvi, I found many of them, some of which cannot be put online of course, lolz. But here are two photos I really love and that's because they were taken at Toto's, Bandra, Sid's favourite watering hole. It's the one place where Sid was always the happiest. And you have no idea how many business deals were done or career-changing advice given here. 


That's why earlier this month on June 2nd, Sid's birthday, friends of Sid and regular patrons of Toto's had put up this plaque to permanently adorn the walls of Toto's and immortalise Sid! SID 2679. Cheers indeed.

I'll end this post with another photo I really like. I took this on June 2nd, 2013. An entire pub was booked for Sid's surprise birthday party, and in the pic is Anant Rangaswami, who was our regular guest at 4B Sea Hill apartment and Sid's very close friend. He passed away last year. Now I know the two of them are reunited once again and toasting together, having a jolly great time. 

All in all, it was a very memorable journey. A part of me was also satisfied that I participated or else I would have regretted not going for the rest of my life. I smiled as I headed back to my much less elegant farmhouse at Neihbawih, Mizoram.