Chp 408. I need a doctor…

Not the “I’m about to lose my mind, you’ve been gone for so long, I need a doctor, call me a doctor” Eminem’s type of doctor love, but an actual doctor.

I’ve always considered myself to be the healthy type, even though I do nothing to take care of my body. And I never fall sick. Of course “never” would be an exaggeration, but you catch my drift right? I’m one of those who can eat all the junk food in the world, sleep in front of an AC with wet hair, drink binge almost every single night until I’m piss drunk, finish 2-3 packs of cigarette a day, yet sometimes work in office for three days at a stretch without sleeping, and yet I hardly fall sick.

*Touchwood* yeah I guess I have been really lucky…

I always thought I’m like this because of my “jock” past, regularly playing basketball, football, volleyball, handball, and every other possible sport every day since I was in class 3…

If you’re a gamer, then consider it like you’re sending your hero who is a paladin or mage or whatever, out on a long quest, and you buy as many health packs as you can for him to carry along. As he fights trolls and goblins along the way, his health reduces but you simply keep rejuvenating him with your health packs, until one fine battle, you’ve run out of health packs and so you need to play cautiously now. Otherwise, he’s going to die.

Well, the game of life is pretty much like that. In the gaming world, you can still buy more health packs later but unfortunately that is not possible in real life.

Due to my wayward lifestyle, I guess I too have now run out of health packs.

Four days ago, I got my first “attack”. We were moving a fridge in our office and it was a bit humid as the AC was not working properly. After lifting the fridge, I started becoming dizzy. I sat down immediately. I couldn’t breathe properly, everything was spinning around me and I was sweating profusely. Finally, I recovered, much to the delight of my boss. Later we found out I had either low BP or high BP attack.

I mean, I know many people who have faced panic attacks, but I never imagined it would ever happen to me. Comon, I’m 32 but never actually grew up mentally beyond 18, still loves partying and pushing myself to the limit. And there I was, a warning given to me.

My dear friends keep asking me, “Why are you so afraid to get a full body check-up?” Well, it’s not that I am afraid to go for a check-up. I’m just afraid to know my result. What if… you know? Yeah. That’s what I’m talking about.

But now my hands are tied. I consulted with my cousin Dr. BT who prescribed a few medicines to take temporarily.

Then I looked up on Lilavati Hospital’s website, which is one of the most renowned hospitals here in Mumbai. I checked out their check-up packages, and shortlisted two that applied to me. I then sent that list to another cousin, Dr. Mahruaii, who suggested I should go for the first one…



Option 1. BASIC PACKAGE – RS.2500/-

I. LAB TESTS
* CBC
* ESR
* BLOOD GROUP

Screening Test for Diabetes
BLOOD SUGAR FASTING

Screening Tests for Liver Function
SGOT
SGPT

Screening Test for Kidney Function
SERUM CREATININE

Total Cholesterol
Urine - Routine / Microscopy
Stool - Routine / Microscopy
Screening Test for Cardiac Function
ECG

II. IMAGING TEST
* X-RAY CHEST
* VISION CHECK

III. CONSULTATION
* PHYSICIAN

------------------------------------------------------

Option 2. ADAM’S PACKAGE – RS. 4500/-

I. LAB TESTS
* CBC
* ESR

Screening Test for Diabetes
BLOOD SUGAR FASTING

Screening Test for Kidney Function
SERUM CREATININE

Tests for Liver Profile
TOTAL PROTEIN
ALBUMIN
SGOT
SGPT
BILIRUBIN
GGTP
PROTHROMBIN TIME
ALKALINE PHOSPHATASE
ACID PHOSPHATE

Total Cholesterol
Urine - Routine / Microscopy
Stool - Routine / Microscopy
Screening Test for Cardiac Function
ECG

II. IMAGING TESTS
* X-RAY CHEST
* SONOGRAPHY Upper Abdomen

III. CONSULTATIONS
* PHYSICIAN
* SURGEON

Healthy, Delicious Breakfast & Lunch

------------------------------------------------------



So hopefully on the first week of next month, I will go for my check-up, my first ever in my life, and see exactly what my condition is. Wish me all the best, lolz.

 Right now I’m thinking, how the hell am I supposed to take my stool sample for the test? Any suggestions? Creative ways will be appreciated :D

Chp 407. Delhi Journal - 6

So here is my final Delhi comic strip before I go back to home sweet home Mumbai tomorrow. Oh wait. I don’t have a home anymore! :(

Anyhoo, I think this post is really apt, especially after yesterday’s hotly discussed news from the Ministry of Home Affairs. :) 

Cheers  :)

Chp 406. Chinki/Chinky in the limelight again

It’s been six years since I wrote my blog post “Chinky: What me insult?” which appeared in “NE Sun” and a couple of other renowned magazines. And today, everybody’s talking about this again because India Today published an article that begins with the sentence… “The next time you decide to call a person from the North-East a ‘Chinki’, you could end up cooling your heels behind bars for the next five years.”

India Today:  North-East racial slur could get you jailed for five years

Growing incidents of racial discrimination and verbal abuse against citizens from the North-East have forced the Ministry of Home Affairs (MHA) to send a letter to all the states and Union Territories, asking them to book offenders guilty of atrocity against people from the region under the Scheduled Castes and Scheduled Tribes (Prevention of Atrocities) Act since a significant number of persons from the North-East belong to the Scheduled Tribes.

The Indian twittersphere responded…

@samar11 tweeted - Five years for calling someone chinki. I guess racist india needed extreme punishment.

While @mojororo stated truthfully - You can now go to jail if you call a North-Easterner a chinki. You can also go to jail for no reason if you are just a North-Easterner.

I had an interesting discussion with my good twit-friend @twilightfairy too who replied - @Mizohican i know and fully agree that politically incorrect terms shd nt be used. but Jail is too much. so many other words deserve jail no?

And I find @aatifsumar’s wisecrack really funny - If I were a North Eastern Indian, I would rename myself to Chinki just to mess with people.

-----------

On the question of whether the slur chink, chinki, chinky etc. is offensive or not, well, I have been called such names many times even at the comment section of my blog, and you can judge for yourselves if you think the usage is offensive or not…

This one was when I wrote the aforementioned blog post [Comment link]

Oh, let’s start by getting things straight, what is this? A Whining little chink from North east? What happened can’t get along with the realities of life in India? Your ugly aids infested wh0rish women and your ugly men, including your butt ugly face and nose, and eyes clearly deserve the word Chink.

Or when I wrote a normal blog post about the internet…  [Comment link]

India doesn’t need whining chinks like you, we just need your land to be the buffer zone , not you. We poured out crores of rupees into Mizoram every year, and what was the result? No industries, nothing. You are just leechers.

Or even this post where I was celebrating India’s diversity… [Comment link]

and where are your chinko mizos? I don't see them anywhere else in the world or even lol in hind-fuk-sthan either, sitting and jumping on bamboo sticks and eating dogs for dinner ?

And there are so many more on just my blog alone, I don’t even want to talk about the rest of the internet…

After being verbally abused like that almost every day and reading such comments everywhere, it’s quite easy for most North-Easterners to assume this is how the rest of India feels about them.

Vice Chancellors of reputed Universities have stereotyped us over and over again. Police racially profile us. Even newspapers continue to stereotype us. Remember “Mail Today” that reported, “The next time a drug peddler knocks on your door to deliver drugs, it will not be an African but a girl from the North East”? [my response to that report]

It’s not just about being called a chinky, but about people whom I’ve never met or known before calling me from the roadside  “Abey watchman”, “momo”, “bahadur”, “ching chong”, “waiter”, and laughing their asses out…

And then comes some of the prominent Indians on twitter, like @gkhamba, who immediately tweeted today -

You can now go to jail for calling someone from the North East chinki. Personally, I prefer "waiter".

…and even got many retweets from his 20K+ followers, making more crude jokes about people from the North East.

And of course if we protest, we are told to grow up or that we lack a sense of humor. I wish these people could put themselves in the shoes of somebody from the North East for just one day and see what we have to endure every day. Haha yeah that would be utterly hilarious. Where’s the sense of humor now, huh?

Overall, when my close friends call me a chinki, I am not offended at all. I know they mean it affectionately. I’ve been outside Mizoram all my life and have more non-Mizo friends than Mizos. I know for a fact that there are many broad minded and politically correct Indians out there. But will this new law stop the few deranged ones from verbally abusing North Eastern people on the streets and restaurants?

Only time will tell, I guess.

Maybe if an example is made of, say, a stand-up comedian who takes pride in calling people from the North East as “waiters”, maybe things will change? Hah, who will have the last laugh then? :)

Nah, just kidding. @gkhamba can be really funny sometimes and I’m sure he’s a really nice guy, and that’s the problem with being a standup comic – sometimes you have to insult certain communities for the sake of wringing out a few laughter from your audience, after all, truth be told, we’re all a little racist inside. As a Mizo, I can laugh to harmless jokes about our Mizo Christian community, our accent, our hot temper, or even about eating dog’s meat (even though many of us don’t eat it). But lines must be drawn and it’s hard to laugh when somebody refer to northeastern women as prostitutes or the men as watchmen or waiters.

But I think most of us are MISSING THE POINT here.

Everybody’s discussing about how chinki can be a racial slur etc etc… completely missing out the crux of the statement from the Ministry of Home Affairs.

@laajjo tweeted - I gather it's in a bad taste to called NEs chinki. When are we banning the sardar, sindhi, South indian, marwari, gujju, baniya jokes then?

@twilightfairy tweeted - Abusing someone does not a baal baanka, but calling someone chinki can land u in jail?

@lifetimefe tweeted - If we go to jail for calling north eastern people chinki, then all north Indians must go to jail for calling south Indians Madrasis.

@kmanojmenon replied - @Mizohican @northeastblog he is extending law to sections to whom it does not apply, will he apply to Biharis, in Mumbai & Delhi ?

 

See, see, see… this is NOT about the word “chinki”, per se. This issue is not just about uttering racial slurs. This is not some new law the MHA made up, out of the blue. It is not suddenly giving people from the North East special status and protection. Many of us are not aware of the Scheduled Caste and Scheduled Tribe (Prevention of Atrocities) Act, 1989 which protects SC and ST people from discriminations and atrocities from the upper castes, like verbal abuses and racial slurs.

If you find this Act unfair, then hey, you can speak to the law makers of our country and tell them to scrap this law or amend it. I didn’t chart this Act. I had nothing to do with it. But as long as this Act is in place, then that means SC and ST people are protected. And most North Eastern people are ST, so that is why you cannot use racial slurs like chinky because according to this Act’s atrocity definition, the one and only reason why you’re abusing him as a chinky is because of his identity, WHICH is indeed an offense under this Act.

Yes, my friend. This Act has always been around, and what India Today did was merely reminded the citizens of this great country about the existence of this Act. 

I hope this tweet by my good friend @MansinghNepram clears some of the confusion…

"Chinki" could get you jailed for five years according to SC/ST act - > Dont belong to SC/ST, no protection for me? :D

He’s from Manipur, a Meitei. Hence he is neither an SC nor ST, unlike his Mizo and Naga neighbors who are all Scheduled Tribes. Therefore, TECHNICALLY, if somebody calls him a chinky, then that perpetrator (unfortunately) CANNOT be punished under this same Atrocities Act.

Hope it’s clear now.

Cheers, y’all. And I’m sure some of the racial abusers will comment on my blog again. Haters gonna hate. :)

Chp 405. Delhi Journal - 5

Sometimes I think it is very important to weigh the pros and cons of a city before deciding which city is better… And those factors differ from person to person.

Cheers!  :)

Chp 404. Delhi Journal - 4

Don’t you guys wish you have some super power too? 

Cheers  :)

Chp 403. Delhi Journal - 3

Urrrmm… yeah sometimes people hear different things, especially when they’re at a new city. The new culture, new environment, new surroundings, new people, new language, all these add to misinterpretation sometimes…

Kinda lame, I know… I just needed something to update today :)

Chp 402. Delhi Journal - 2

You like momos? Me too. I LOVE them… Delhi roadside momos are the best because they are cheap and tasty as hell, especially with their spicy momo chutney. Back in Mumbai, the momos are either not that good, or you’ll find the tasty ones only in expensive Chinese restaurants…

But then, I had a recent experience here in Delhi…

Hmmmm… :(

Chp 401. Delhi Journal - 1

Day 9. Still in Delhi. What was supposed to be a 4 day visit, has gone beyond a week now. I am skin-burnt, homesick, and gaining a lot of weight because of all the yummy (and cheap) street food. The words “bhen chod” seem to come out of my mouth automatically now. When in Rome, speak like the Romans, I guess. 

To make up for inactivity on my blog for the past two months, I’ll be posting a Delhi Journal comic strip every day for the next one week. Cheers :-)

Chp 400. End of an ERA

Perhaps it is quite apt that my 400th post is about the end of an era. An era of living at Greenfields, one of the best apartments in the suburbs.

I was staying at Greenfields for the past 4 years, until 3 days ago, and before that my sister was there for 3 years and I used to visit her occasionally after dropping out from B-School. In fact my association with Greenfields was almost as old as my blog. The apartment outlived two relationships of mine, churned out a new one and saw a lot of my friends come and go - Happy times, sad times, sleepy times, but mostly, drunken times.

Some of the things I loved about Greenfields Society - the people were awesome. From the time I stayed there till the time I left, I didn’t have a single issue with my neighbors. In fact when I went to renew my rental agreement last year, my landlord and I had to get an approval from the Society President. The first question the president asked me was, “Why was there not even a single complaint about you for the past three years? No loud music playing, no loud partying, no loud noise, no nothing. What are you up to?” Lolz.

Trust me, I wasn’t that pally with my neighbors either. There were three families on my floor. At the most, we were just on a “hi-bye” relationship. But we knew each other very well, and knew where to draw the line. Of course there were loud parties at my pad sometimes, but my neighbors never complained because they knew I was just a bachelor trying to have that occasional fun (before it’s too late), and they also knew very well that I wouldn’t be doing that regularly. We understood each other and co-existed peacefully.

And then there were other things like 24/7 water supply, 24/7 electricity, and it was extremely peaceful and quiet. No loud dhantanakakakaka festival or marriage celebrations were allowed inside. And on the weekends, there were 2-3 flats in my building who would blast songs like Here without you, November rain etc, and even the latest hiphop songs. I never got to figure out who those people were, but it was nice to have such people in the building.

Situated right on the prime Jogeshwari Vikroli link road, Powai was just a few minutes away on one side and the Western Express was around 10 minutes away on the other side. And then there were Goregaon’s HUB and Oberoi Mall not very far too. It was the perfect 1 BHK apartment. Cozy, fully furnished and good vibes. Seven years of comfort at that place.

All that ended this Monday.

Why did I take the extreme step of shifting out from such an awesome place?

Well, I am still not at liberty to talk about what I’ve been up to the past one month, until things are confirmed. But for now, I’ve moved into my CEO’s place temporarily, an amazing duplex apartment at Khar West. So that means partying and binging every night when you have such a kickass awesome CEO. :-)

Here are some pics I took that day – my last day at Greenfields…

With some of my neighbor’s kids who regularly hangout at my pad and call me “Cool Uncle Kim” :-)


Woke up early on my last day. Took a photo that I always saw every day for the past 7 years.


Hehe… Trying to get rid of all the eggs before the movers and packers arrived…


All the warmth, all the coziness… all packed and gone now :-(


My bed… it never got lucky, if you know what I mean…


The morning after, at my CEO’s duplex -


One of the perks of staying (temporarily) with a CEO. He has to be informed. Hence, there is no dearth of daily newspapers.


Cheers :-)