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Monday, September 22, 2008

Chp 199. It's so lonely at the Top!

Latest EPL Standing as of September 22, 2008
4.Aston Villa5311101073
5.West Ham United530291192
7.Hull City4211758-3
9.Manchester City42026972

14.Manchester United41215440

[This is just the appetizer. Read on for more! ]

Time for a brief football break!

I can’t believe I haven’t written any football post in a loooong time! A new EPL season has already begun and I haven’t written anything about my team Arsenal. Gasp, I am ashamed to call myself an Arsenal fan.

With new work and new commitment, I still find the time to watch ever single Arsenal game on TV here in Mumbai. And even though Mumbai may be divided on the whole marathi manoos incidents and who is supporting who etc, one thing is for sure though – Here in the suburbs of Andheri East, there is a HUGE Arsenal fan base! Lolz.

Lemme explain.

For many of us who don’t have dish TV and Tata Sky etc, we subscribe to this one cable operator. And that cable operator, the stingy bastard that he is, gives us only THREE freaking channels for sports. In those three channels, he gives us ESPN, Star Sports, Neo Sports, DD Sports, Star Cricket, Ten Sports and Zee Sports, selectively broadcasting only three channels at a time depending on the program that is currently going on.

We have to call him up to request for a change in those channels if a particular sports channel we want to watch is not being broadcasted, and depending on the majority, he switches the channels. And most of the time his number is engaged.

Of course, cricket is what’s shown on those three channels most of the time.

But then, the funny thing is, every single Arsenal match is shown! Suppose there’s an Arsenal game at 7:30pm. Till 7:29pm there is some boring cricket match on Star Cricket or NEO sports broadcasted, and then at exactly 7:30, the screen suddenly goes bzzzzz for a fraction of a second and then ESPN or Star Sports comes on, broadcasting the Arsenal game.

I likeee very mucheee.

I long to meet the other Gunners supporters around my area here in Andheri East. I want to know these other guys who are calling up our cable operator every time there is an Arsenal match. I want to meet them, and watch Arsenal games together. After all, Arsenal fans are ultra cool dudes, unlike ManUtd and Chelsea supporters who are greedy and obnoxious and only after money.

(pssst psssst… this is a football post. You really think there’s not going to be any ManUtd Chelsea bashing? )

The other day I was quite pissed.

I missed the UEFA Champions League match between Arsenal and Dynamo Kiev recently. So the next day, the first thing I did when I reached office was visit

And what do I find?

Suddenly is no longer mozilla firefox friendly! Aaaaargh.

Here are a few screen shots I took that day.

WTF is this? How the hell are we supposed to read the articles when the stupid embedded Ad is blocking half the article!!???

The Ad is a Flash application so I could not drag it away from the article, and there was no CTA (call to action) to close the freaking Ad.

The webpage looked fine using internet explorer though. And I hate IE. I hate anything that tries to monopolize a market just because they have the moolah (yeah sometimes the communist in me speaks louder than the capitalist in moi).

Compatible only with IE? This kinda goof-ups should happen only to ManUtd and Chelsea homepages, because it fit in perfectly with their ideology and so called team spirit. But not with Arsenal, which is about true talent and genuine football spirit.

Last night ManUtd and Chelsea played. Guess who won? The young Gunners! Lolz. The game ended in a draw, benefiting Arsenal by a great deal.

ManUtd are still not even in the top 10 even till now. I’m telling you, all that hype about Berbatov joining and Ronaldo choosing club loyalty over money etc is just plain BS. This time the Red Devils are going to be relegated. Hyuk hyuk.

You could see the desperation in the way they played. Ronaldo started his usual falling down tricks but that wasn’t enough to beat the Blues. Man, that Ronaldo guy falls down so easily, sometimes if I just shake my TV, there he falls!

And sometimes when ManUtd aren’t able to win any match, they start playing volleyball! You guys should have seen that goal attempt by Scholes the other night when they played against Zenit St.Petersburg for the UEFA CL. Or maybe he was attempting another "Hand of God" shot à la Maradona, except of course, this was not so subtle and it was more like a beach volleyball smash. Hahaha. What will these guys think of next?

Watch that hilarious video here, courtesy NaziSriLanka

Really that desperate to score?

And of course good ol’ Sir Alex was quick to come in his defense saying it was "instinctive". Lolz. More than 20 years that dude has been playing professional football and you call that instinctive? Yeah I agree. After all, that is how ManUtd have been winning most of their matches – through unfair means. You are so right, Sir Alex. That was indeed instinctive. All hail the Mancheaters United!


Jimmy said...

WTF is this? How the hell are we supposed to read the articles when the stupid embedded Ad is blocking half the article!!???
Adblock Plus is your friend, All smart people use Adblock Plus, It Appears That You Are Not One Of Them!

Mariuca said...

Hola Sandman! Hmmmmm, not that EPL is back, my Sat nights are filled with football too since B will be conquering the TV the whole night! ;)

illusionaire said...

Ah. Installing plugin as I write this. Thanx. But still, the question remains. Why were the Ads blocking the page? That's not how Ads are supposed to function. If they indeed cover a page, they are supposed to have a minimize or close CTA, which was not available that time.

illusionaire said...

oh Marzieee! U commented while moi was replying to a comment :) predestination! :P

Which team is B supporting? Plz tell me its Arsenal too!!! :)

Check out the new pic I am adding to this post right now. :D

Pixie said...


I loved the smilie at the bottom :P
I am not such a huge football fan... but i do comment on "such" posts as well since I enjoy your writing :P

Mihir said...

Lets wait till Eduardo comes back. I hope he begins where he left off last season :) And when is Rosicky going to come back ? Seems like he is perenially injured :(

I still think we are 1-2 bodies short in midfield and defence and a injury crisis like late last yr could derail our title challenge again. But one thing is sure, when we turn on the style, even the greedy Chelsea/ManU fans have to applause :)

Shashi Kant Sharma said...

Hi ..
I am a regular follower of your blog, but I hardly do comment ..maybe coz we dont't know each other.

And how do I relate to most of your blogs .. thats because I've done all my schooling -> I - XII in aizawl.

Well, the reason I finally was "forced" to post was coz I saw a name pop up in you blog, Sir Alex...
Is this by any chance Sir Alex from St. Paul's ... do i make sense ? :)

Nirav said...

Heh... It was such a great feeling to see that c*nt Ronaldo dive yesterday! I thought he underwent surgery so his ankles would be able to hold his body still for more than 5 mins.. but alas!

And yup, its early days yet... But its really reassuring to see the way the likes of Walcott and Bendtner have shaped up this season. Even Eboue, Denilson, Song have done a decent job. But I still think we need a good DM in there...

Jimmy said...

Beats me. With adblock plus turned off, the ads and the site render very well on Fx :-/

Naupang^Fel said...

Arsenal! Huh :( I'm not a big fan of the EPL itself but I feel pity for Arsenal and its supporters. No offense, though.

Just like England, Arsenal is one of the clubs which usually turn down their supporters at the last resort. With an excellent performance at the beginning, they usually put their story into a big tragedy at the end of the season.

Hopefully you'll win this time with your "brainy" manager's efforts :)

VaiVa said...

Hey... Bosss!! EPL...Crouch left Liverpool and I'm Liverpool fan once again though it was horrible to watch them draw against poor Stoke City at Anfield.

Man Utd leh an Sponsor khi ti duhdah e mai!Tunlai chu.. a dik a dika sawi chuan, EPL match ka en hman vek si lo hian ka hunawl neih te EA ho football FIFA 08 hi PS 2 ah khel tlut tlut mai. Blog pawh kan theihnghilh mai dawn a lawm!

VIkram said...

Must say, Paul Scholes's ball 'handling' abilities are quite good, that was a good 'finish', wasnt it. ;)

illusionaire said...

@ mihir: lolz! Long time no see dude. But I'm not surprised at all that you're here on my Arsenal post! :) Long live the Gunners! I agree MF and Defense still look shaky, especially since experience is needed more in that sector that forward, but I believe they will pull through nicely this season. Plus we have a much fiercer firepower at offense compared to last season. Sure we're currently missing some of the players, but I don't think it will be like last season when they had to pull up youngsters from the youth squad to fill up the team! lolz. But even with those 16 years olds, we still managed to come 3rd. Haha!

But lately have you noticed, the one-touch Arsenal specialty seems to be lacking, even though there is still a lot of style and flair...

@ nirav: That Ronaldo dive was PRICELESS!!!! Even the referee just laughed! lolz. The entire stadium erupted in laughter. I don't know how that dude can wake up every morning and have the guts to look at himself in the mirror. Seriously, I don't know how people can be a fan of such kind of a players, unless of course they share the same characteristic. hehehe.

@ sashi: Heyy. Thanx for visiting my blog regularly.

No dude, that "Sir Alex" I mentioned is the coach for ManUtd. Not that infamous Sir Alex of St.Pauls. I've never studied there but I have lots of friends from there and heard a lot about him. :) But sadly, the "Sir Alex" I am talking about is Alex Ferguson.

And plz, don't hesitate to comment next time. If you read my blog, that automatically means we are no longer strangers :)

illusionaire said...

@ Pixie: That is so sweet of you :) Thanx for the comment. haha, and glad you liked that smiley. Looks naughty, doesn't it? :)

@ Jimmy: Niceee. Thanx once again for the plugin.

@ vikram: It was indeed a good finish. lolz. But I don't know how he could keep a straight face even after the referee gave him red. If I was me and I did a really stupid thing as that and I was caught, I would definitely be grinning and laughing at myself as I walk out from the field. :)

@ vaiva: Hahaha, that draw was funny :) Stokes city? Comon!!! :D

FIFA 08 ang a nuam ve tho game dang a awm kha... "soccer world cup" tih a nia, Atari a khelh tur, joystick nen... :D

@ naupang fel: lolz. Don't worry bro, Arsenal wont repeat what they did last season. This time they are going to maintain their numero uno position. Last season they were down with injuries and had to use players from their reserve youth team to play for the main team. Thats where they screwed up. They started pulling anybody who wanted to play from the crowd and made them play for the team. Kids as young as 7 years old were playing for the team, but even with all that, Chelsea and ManUtd barely managed to scrap past Arsenal. Thats how great we are!!!

Sekibuhchhuak said...

Kan vengah hian STARtv kan tih ang kha pawh an phal ve lova, CCTv hian an tichhuak ve ngai bawk silova live in. ka la en lo tun season chu:-(

Arsenal line up hi an patuai tha hlawm bawk a, bul an tran that chu a rinawm. Pressure san hunah ah pawh an tihthat zel beiseii ang.

An tlar hnung lam hi tlemin ka ngaihtuah deuh.

Btw, keipawh Arsenal fan ka ni a, mahse, i tran ve tih ka hirat hnu hian Man U ka tran deih mai teh ang :-D

Shashi Kant Sharma said...

Ohh u meant that completely carried away there i guess ...

And well .. people JUST can't get my name right.. its shashi, not sashi... :)

Well its a hell lotta other things too .. got all of them from my years in aiz..

sazu-mai-kang (As I rem this meant burnt-rat-tail)

kant-ea (Yeah, me a mizo .. )

getting carried away thr again ...

Naupang^Fel said...

@Kima - You said, "They started pulling anybody who wanted to play from the crowd and made them play for the team."

LOL. Should I believe it or not machi :) Hopefully you might as well get a chance this time Bro. Hihihi... Pull up your socks, tighten your screws and get ready to fly over Emirates Stadium one day :))))

luliana said...

Well well, someone is getting carried away here already, just after five matches :D

Gunners do play attractive, fast paced attacking football..But I think the squad is a bit too thin, I'm afraid it might effect them AGAIN as the season progress..although I would love to see a non-man u, non-chelsea team winning the league this season..

The Chhamanator said...

Oh my my!! A supporter of a douchebag team lambasting another douchebag team. That's just plain pathetic. There is only one football club in London and they are called the Tottenham Hotspurs.

anna diora said...

new blog. i'll register to your directory sometime later when i'm free.

the only sport i'm interested in & was ever good at was gymnastics. hah.

- Anne.

Mariuca said...

He he unfortunately B is a huge Liverpool fan! ;) But me, I support Arsenal woo hoo!

Btw, I have a very special award for you, congrats!

Anonymous said...

hehe funny... arsenal vs manutd...
even they got 1 point in their own home, they are happy like anything when they play against manutd

illusionaire said...

@ seki: eeeeeeee. Ka Arsenal te i lo tan ve ringawt a maw? i zawk lawmni. :-P Min ngaisang ve mawle nang hi chuan... ka tih tih hi i rawn copy a... football lo lamah te... hehehehehe....

@ Shashi: lolz. Sorry dude. And your Mizo is pretty good too! lolz. And you know what? From what you've mentioned, you have been in Mizoram way longer than I have been :) I was studying outside Miz from 2nd standard. :-(

@ naupang^fel: Seriously, I'm not kidding! Arsenal fans mipui ho thutna ah pu Arsene Wenger a han chho a, mipui ho a duh duh pathum pali vel a pawt chhuak a, Arsenal tan a khelh tir nghal. Chuti chung chuan ManUtd te pawn min la hneh theilo mawle! :)

@ Luliana: Nopessss. The squad isn't as thin as last season any more. Plus there are many injured players about to return to the squad soon because they are in the final phase of recovery.

illusionaire said...

@ chhamanator: Once again, I ask, who are these strange people called spurs you keep mentioning? :-P Which division are they playing for? It's very tough for us to keep track of all the small fishes swimming below us because sometimes they are relegated and new fishes come in their place and blah blah blah etc... so please understand us for not knowing.


@ anne: Heyyy! cool. Looking forward to your registration. So you are going solo this time? :D

@ marzie: I've said it there and I'll say it here again too. Thank youuuuuu for the award sweetie. And it sure is nice to follow each other on twitter :) I'm really starting to like it!

@ anonymous: who? manutd people? yeah I know, they are so happy when they get just one point even at their home. Arsenal is playing so great recently that the EPL officials are planning to award them 4 points instead of the usual 3 points.


The Chhamanator said...

This comment space intentionally left blank so that I can write an "I told you so" comment on the 24th of May, 2009.

mang said...

oink oink, Arsenal fan, kim you better shift your loyalty to Chelsea like me!!! ha ha(Quote: Hull City 2 -1 Arsenal), sometimes like the Indian Cricket team (don't overestimate them).Used to be a hard-core Arsenal fan,but i reckon i got disappointed so many times. why on earth do they sell Omre? A better team compare to last season but Robin Persie will have to contribute more if...

Vikram said...

Hey man, the Asian U-16 championships are about to start, but your fellow statesman Malswamfela looks like he is out. Any thoughts on that up coming tournament ?